Prologue- why it took 15 years to write this book aka Squirrel Chapter 1- this is why we can’t have nice things Cats claw furniture, dogs eat the floor, and. Filth Chapter 2-Rules about your pud/the best toy I am ever giving you It's yours and you can play with it, but not at dinner time. Don't talk to anyone in the public bathroom and don't show anyone your pud. Chapter 3- Mom, where’s the garbage Chapter 4- what’s in the box Magic beans? Condoms? Chapter 6- what’s bothering Luke
Chapter 6-excited by air Chapter 7- what’s the recipe There is no recipe, you just know when the texture is right. Chapter 8- Driving with Teen Boys
Chapter 11- Huelelo and other fun sayings
Chapter 13- Pseudonym
Chapter 15- there isn’t enough marijuana in this car
Chapter 16- Don’t make me stop this couch CHAPTER 17 I’m a good goddamn time. Chapter 18- first jobs Chapter 19- what’s mom’s favorite word
Chapter 21- that’s shitty chapter 22- that’s nuts Pig at Holmdel Sheep at Monmouth county fair CHAPTER 23- are you gonna eat that? Yes Chapter 24- why do you have to make so much god damn noise Chapter 25- I like to make stuff
Chapter 26- You’re not the boss of me Chapter 27- Tradewear and where to find them Chapter 28- Meaningless Expletives Chapter 29- Crazy Relatives Chapter 30- the revenge of the spastic Chapter 31- Puns. Bad puns Chapter 32 Family Song
Chapter 33- You can dress me up but you cant take me out Chapter 34- what fell out of foodchick
Chapter 35- how the wild life got their names
Chapter 38- reventures Kayaking, kayaking, and more kayaking Chapter 39- I don’t think that means what you means Chapter 40- righteously indignant Chapter 41- stupid human tricks Tongue W Chapter 43- I can’t take you anywhere
Chapter 44- Don’t mess with mama bear Chapter 45- why do my tits itch Chapter 46- movie quotes Chapter 47- Shower Thoughts Chapter 48- All the things we can’t remember Chapter 49- various friend stories Mike getting licked Final chapter- I’m just gonna leave it at that
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AuthorI make stuff. Sometimes the stuff is pretty, sometimes not. My wife, 2 dogs, 3 kids and 3 cats keep me busy and on my toes. Archives
January 2022
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